wad a fruitful week. whahahs. exercise. play. eat. enjoy life! juz had big walk last sunday. tink we onli walked arnd. 8km? yarhs. cos we are slower den others i suppose. den in the end cut across the road. lazy-ness. anyway the big walk is fun. tiring. hot. maybe all of us will die in survivor. who knows ? hahahs.

also celebrated sabby's bdae. went for steamboat the night b4. but i didnt go. sick again. wad the. lols. den the next day we brought her arnd singapore. to bishan. to marine parade. to jurong east. popped up questions i didnt noe how to answer. act pretendence and ignorance and u name it. hahahahs. but it was still fun. we all made our way to sabrina's hse. camped there. she appeared. in expecting us there. well it doesnt matter. at least we haf fun. and we were pizza hut freaks. we devour we dont eat. hahahahs.

went to tp yesterday. lols. although i am not a student dere. LOL. just an unauthorised personel. oops. security isnt tight afterall. hahahs. they are having their sports cca fair yesterday near their business block. somehow "toured" arnd the school with shiya mh and song.i like their school. hmm but i love my school too. whahahahs. hmm. den we slacked at their cable tv corner. which is my favourite. but no fate for further usage anymore. lols. hais.

oh yarhs. school is starting for me next monday. while hg they all alrdi started tis week. kheng will be happily waiting at home. cum rotting. poor him. but he s u c k anyway. who tell him go blast me in gb. everytime use turtle turtle turtle.
oops. ok den. enough of crapping. hahahs.

and hais. 4 years of friendship has been reduced to such stage dat i wonder. why do we even become friends in the ferst place. the person i least expected to give up on us. did just that. wad else can i say ? the more expectations we expect. the bigger disappointment we got. the question in my head. what happened to you.

wads around you is no longer our voices but plain silence.

back from orientation. wow. tired and shag. u name it. hahahs. anyway the orientation is fun. eagerness. every happy thing ends with it. taught by hafiza. she's one cool gurl. told us one racist joke. indians use 12 units. oh my gawd. hahahs. my sweetie indeed. lols. anyway it started with gathering at the theatre of arts. ferst step into the place. looked around and realised. it reali resembled singapore poly's auditorium. memories of arts nite. hahahs. missed it. oh well. dats all in sweet memory lane i guess.

as usual. met our OGL. lynn ! from east view too. my co senior last tym. woohoos. am not alone! den we walked arnd the school. to our block. escalators everywhere. hehe. like mrt station lidat. my classroom was situated at 4th storey. P408. sounds cool. my class name. CPT 0506. yay! hahahs.den proceeded to playing games. warm up games like dog bone and wacko comes ferst. treasure hunt comes second. we ran. we sang. we laughed. and we SWEAT a big time mans ! whahahs. yarhs. the earth on rolling stone. the 4 giant bridges. lunch at 2 and tea at 4. the clues drive us mad. crazy. oh well. hahahs. we came in third. thanks to our OGL. and our "presidential smile" yanxi. yarh. he is veri yang guang kind of guy. dats why he became our class rep. hahahs.

after dat is telematch. held in our sports hall. huge. enormous. big was wad i can sae about our sports hall. plus olympic sized pools. too bad ! hahs. i cant swim. wad the. anyway we came in ferst. yay. blindfolds and ping pong balls. hahahs. farnie. next came the last game. lining up of things to make the longest chain in the hockey field. we formed human chains. and lotsa stuff lined up. shoes. shoelaces. paper. belts. and even shirts. yarhs. the guys took off their shirts. lols. by the time. we are all wet. the water bombs they made later were even worse. hahahs.

the second day. indoors most of the tym. wad i loved most. performance by every class. all of dem performed skit. gay acts. fairytales. u name it. whahahas. our class was peculiar. we danced. bananas watermelons and buttock dances. from da song...hey YAaaaa ! hahahs. and we got consolation. or shld u say 4th. hahahs. den albert. our year 3 student. cum mc. did pole dance. under much "stress" from us and the OGLs. LOL.

orientation was fun. made alot of friends. but if nyp was slightly closer. dat would b so much beta. oh well. besides orientation. there is the bbq of SOX aso. alot of stuffs happened. made me lost. blamed. uneasy. scolded. but it was still not bad either. at least the satays are nice.

if outsiders like us alreadi felt so bad. heartbroken. hurt. i couldnt imagine. how torturing it is going to be. for u.

when pride builds me up till i cant see my soul. will you break down these walls. and pull me through ?

oh mans. yay. hahahs. i am sick ! what the. well well. simply hate the feeling of being sick. so damn sickening. hahahs. the feeling as if throwing up a goldfish u just swallowed lidat. eeeww. now i am a frequent visitor to MY toilet. lols.

anyway enough of crap. sickening arhs. chalet coming. heard that funds are not enough. guess expenses are really high. anyway i tink they booked alrdi. yarhs. nothing can bring us down. hahahs. should be this friday, saturday and sunday.

warcraft craze is back ! whahahas. frozen throne everyday. i mean. almost every day. playing lan is fun. yarhs. love it. 6 of us. versus 6 computer insane. three by three by six. woohoos ! we won. oh my gawd. cant believe it. we chiong different units of different races. for me. chimaeras. mountain giants. but the latter is for other purposes. elmo says its gay porn. not OKAY. i just love cute units. though they are useless. whahahas. jason tinks so too. we buy cute units.

the day before. intended to play tower defence. in the end. didnt. and tis time round. me kheng yx song elmo ang. against 6 insane together. we lose ! hahahs. stupid computer. moon joined us yesterday. we played against elmo and song. i duno who won by the way. duhs.

anyway frozen throne is nicer. much nicer. hahahs. talked on the fone with moon kheng and yexiang last nite. yx played with the songs. changed the tempo and speed. but some were nice. hahahas. guess we really had nothing better to do ehs. wad the. hahahs. they went to play lan today again. didnt tag along. arghs. cos the medicine made me very sleepy. luckily i never see stars. hahahs.

raindrops keep falling on my head.

red big puffy eyes. know my eyes are big enough. holds more water. all from crying. i am not a peabrain now. more like a goldfish or nemo perhaps. hahahs. just had a talk with the girls. saddening. because i was an utter failure to myself. dats y i let them down. its all my fault. heaven played this joke on me. a hefty one.

anyway i tried my best. we listened to each other. and came to know something. huhs. there is reali alot of misunderstandings going on. foolish me. cause i always land myself in deep shit. deep trouble. or perhaps even disappoint people around me. one of my rainy days in life today. be it him. them. myself. always a sad case. if i was born a mute. or lose the power to speak. maybe things will turn out better. listens like a sounding board without advice. how nice ehs. but it isnt. if things were as simple as this. perhaps we will never experience quarrels. never experience disagreements. never experience misunderstandings. and never understand one another more. i doesnt want the lather though. i just wan occassion rains. so that it brings out occassional rainbows. it cant be sunny days every day.

somehow the rain didnt stop. they may not doubt me. but i still doubt myself. doubt my ability to return to last time. doubt the undoubtness in me. doubt my personality. the barrier in myself is always the hardest to cross. but i still hold some faith. 4 words. die die must try. lols. tis is me isnt it. when heaven gives me lemons. make lemonades out of it. when life gives me trash. recycle it. oh well. leopard's spots are hardest to change. not impossible though. hahahs.

am i tired? i guess so. physically i mean. mentally ? not yet. i am not going to give up. but i resign to fate. anyway. hope all of us feel better. afterall. i should be counting my blessings. at least all of you are frank.

rain rain go away...

hmmms...feeling so light hearted today. just updated my friendster profile. just had conference till 4 tis morning. just woke up with the sun shining on tis lazy bum. feel that today is another day !

is da chalet going on ? i duno. haf to collect de money when elmo is in vietnam. he's back he's back ! but da money wasnt collected. oh well i am such a stupid debt collector. loansharks out dere pls dont employ me. lols. anyway heard from song and teng dat the chalet is stil going on. but it isnt easy. because peak season is coming ! hard to book any chalet if the advance period isnt advanced enough. my gawd. ohh yarhs. a trend is going around. hahahs. friendship fragile ? fragile friendship ? who started it. u or me? she or she? blahs. ya friendship is fragile. hais. tis is the sad part of life. but friendship will not be broken if it is handled carefully.

wanna stay at home and rot. looks like its pretty hard cos i keep going out. going out equals spending money. dead meat tis time round. hope that money can drop down from the sky. siao ehs. or robin hood where are you? rob the rich and gave it to the poor. hahahs. i am going crazy. come on. robin hood save poverty not spendrifts. whahahahs.

well well. time for reflection girl. stop spending money like water. its not like u got a job like last time and you are now spendin money like there is no tomorrow. lols. self preaching sumtymes do help yarhs.

listening to tong hua now. sad song. sad life. sad story. sad ending. thought tong hua is supposed to have happy endings. looks like sum doesnt. hais. anyway kept hanging with pris moon elmo and kheng. likes the feeling. but cant lie to myself. i miss sabrina meihuey zhengxi and yeeteng alot. though its not their day sumtimes. oh well. they might be just beside me. yet the feeling is so distant. u call dat so near yet so far? hahahs. looks like boon siang is right. life and death isnt the greatest distance afterall.

cant go back to memories. cant fly back to past. we can only continue to walk into the future. yet the future looks bleak for all of us. yet ever so bright for one alone. new frens come old frens go. tis isnt correct. new frens come yes. old frens remain. why are there cases of disappointment in friends.

big disappointment. big let down. when we give all our heart and souls to a commitment in friendship. we shld normally be contented of the generosity we are giving out. and attain happiness in the process of giving. other frens may not understand and in turn take us for granted. mayb they tried making ammends. mayb they didnt realised. when we treat others good we cant expect them to treat us equally well back. expectations normalli fail us the least we expected to. at least we tried. so no regrets marhs. if they did not care about anything. fair weather friends come and go. let them go.

never bring untied knots everywhere you go. before u wan to make any commitments. be it bgr or friends. untie the knots in your heart ferst. have you gotten over it ? prepared to face another disappointment come wad may ? ready to give wad u have to it ? never be afraid of wad may be infront. same as. why do we live when we will still die one day. the process of course. for me. one great page in my process. bintan ! time for next page. dont brood over same chapters again. genting ? lols.

wow. wad reali matters most is. the greatest findout of the day. u can reali make a difference !

=) i am back.

speech day. outings. hot weather. i need the aircon ! lols...the weather nowadays is reali veri hot...try standin in the heat for 3 mins with an ice cream on your hand...and u wil c a sweating person with a pool of cream on his hands...hahahs...

it was our speech day last friday...we went back to east view...we can considered guests "labelled" under pris's frens...lols...and tis yr round was different...adopted a wedding kind of concept...where the hall is filled with round tables...looks sumthing like a ge tai to us though...hahahs...anyway the ending was great...cos the cheerleaders were close to tears when they tok abt their graduation...ya lorhs....cos graduation normalli has a price to pay for it...
after dat...they planned to go pasir ris beach de fisherman village to eat...but ended up in macs instead...lols....interesting..

and we keep hitting to arcades nowadays...RF4 ma...hahahs....with zhengxi moon and meihuey...and of course tis few days..me and moon's favourite hang out is kheng's hse...cos got free food...free dinner...and i can watch my fav mtv channel...lols....no doubt we messed up his house...and moon found her so called trigger...we laughed and screamed like crazy ppl in an asylum lidat...well...thanx to the HZGG show...which made moon hate myanmmar...u shld c how she curse the country...lols...and kheng its tym to tell your maid i cant eat crabmeat..HAHA...

and elmo is back ! hahahs...frm vietnam...hope he is feelin beta...somehow tinks dat he reali enjoyed being in vietnam....cos in vietnam...there is hardly anything to worry about....compared to the stress and tension u feel between frens nowadays...hais...

oh yarhs...me yexiang elita and jason went to bugis yesterdae...got rid of two com passes for money..and to tink dat the full timer gave us full refund...cos black com and generic passes and giftv cant be refunded...can onli help to sell....hahahs...well...jason got wacked by a kid aso...cos the kid thot he wans to rob him...LOL...and yx jason aso found their sling bags....and ang's one is more cheaper...cos we bargained....and poor yexiang...looks like the 90 cents plan didnt work ehs..hohoho...

i wan the happiness and security in sox like last tym...y does it seem further and further now ?